1 
 

Kuthetha ukuthini ukunyamezela? An autoethnographic inquiry that 

uses Boal’s concept of Rituals and Masks to explore how gender-based 

violence is intentionally or unintentionally perpetuated in intimate 

partner relationships. 

by  

Yonela Ngoni  

 

15 January 2023 

 

Submitted in partial fulfilment of the requirements for the degree  

 

MASTERS IN APPLIED DRAMA 

In the  

Wits School of Arts - Drama for Life  

UNIVERSITY OF THE WITWATERSRAND 

 

Supervisor: Tamara Guhrs  

 

 

 

 



2 
 

 

DECLARATION 

I, the undersigned, hereby declare that the work contained in this research report is my own original 

work and that it has not previously, whether in its entirety or in part, been submitted to the 

University of the Witwatersrand or any other for the purpose of a degree. I have used the author-

date convention for citation and referencing. Each significant contribution to and quotation in this 

essay from the work or works of other people has been acknowledged through citation and 

reference.  This reflection is my work. I have not allowed and will not allow anyone to copy my 

work with the intention of passing it off as their own work. I understand that the University of the 

Witwatersrand may take disciplinary action against me if there is a belief that this is not my own 

unaided work or that I failed to acknowledge the source of the ideas or words in my writing. My 

ethics clearance number is WSOA20211009. 

Name:   Yonela Ngoni 

Date: 18 April 2022 

Signature:  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



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Table of Contents  

Declaration……………………………………………………………………………..……..2 

List of Figures………………………………………………………………………………...5 

Section 1……………………………………………………………………………………...6 

Research Title………………………………………………………………………………...6 

Background.…………………………………………………………………………………..6 

Problem Statement…………………………………………………………………………....8 

Research Questions……………………………………………………………………….....13 

Context and individual-specific inquiry….……………………...…………………………..13 

Theoretical Framework………………………………………………………………………15 

Therapeutic potential of Boal’s work…….………………………………………………….16 

Toxic Masculinity in Women/Toxic Femininity………………………………………….…18 

GBV in Intimate Partner Relationships………………………………………………………22 

Battered Woman Syndrome………………………………………………………………….24 

Section 2…………………………………………………………………………………..…28 

Research Method………………………………………………………………………….…28 

Ethnographic Refusal………………………………………………………………………...29 

Ethical Considerations………………………………………………………………….……29 

Rituals and Masks…………………………………………………………………………....30 

The process…………………………………………………………………………………..34 

Preparing the Self……………………………………………………………………………34 

Background to Enabling GBV in an Intimate Partner Relationship………………………….34 



4 
 

Preparing the mind, body and space………………………………………………………….37 

Ritual 1: traditional influences…….………………………………………………………....39 

Ritual 2: economic influences………………………………………………………………..40 

Ritual 3: cultural influences……………………………………………………………….…41 

The ritual performance...……………………………………………………………...….…..42 

Ritual 1 performance abstract: cultural influence…………………………………………....43 

Ritual 2 performance abstract: economic influence…………………………………………43 

Ritual 3 performance abstract: traditional influence……………………………………..….44 

Disrupting the Ritual………………………………………………………………………...45 

Section 3……………………………………………………………………………….…….47 

Findings……………………………………………………………………….………….…..47 

Structural factors……………………………………………………………………………..47 

Reinforcement of Rituals and Masks through gender performativity………………………..48 

Toxic masculinity…………………………………………………………………………….49 

Internalising toxic femininity………………………………………………………………...50 

Learned helplessness…………………………………………………………………………51 

Rituals and Masks as a reflexive platform…………………………………………………...52 

Before the Performance………………………………………………………………………54 

During the Performance………………………………………………………………………56 

Post-Performance……………………………………………………………………..………59 

Conclusion…………………………………………………………………………………....59 

Limitations……………………………………………………………………………….…...60 

Recommendations…………………………………………………………………………..61 



5 
 

Reference List………………………………………………………………………………63 

 

LIST OF FIGURES 

Figure 1……………………………………………………………………………………41 

Figure 2…………………………………………………………………………………….47 

 

 

 

 

  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



6 
 

Research Title  

Kuthetha ukuthini ukunyamezela? An autoethnographic inquiry that uses Boal’s concept of 

Rituals and Masks to explore how gender-based violence is intentionally or unintentionally 

perpetuated in intimate partner relationships. 

Section 1  

Background 

 I often hear stories from perpetrator’s family members claiming that their son is too good a human, 

swearing he would never harm a fly. Oftentimes I see young girls and women refusing to leave 

abusive relationships, claiming that their man loves them, and violence is their means of 

communicating love and security for their female partners. I hear a lady gossiping in a taxi about 

overhearing her lady neighbour getting beaten up by their boyfriend or husband, but not 

considering reporting the atrocious act. I hear family elders complain about women who are vocal 

about gender-based violence (GBV), claiming that they have no place in marriage and will never 

find or keep a man as a wife. Contemporary wedding rituals glorify married women “educating” 

the bride about endurance towards an abusive spouse; yet according to my experience, no one 

bothers educating men about how women are not objects to be abused in marriages, or how to 

persevere should the wife become abusive towards them. As a black, female, heterosexual survivor 

of GBV who attempted laying charges against an abusive ex-boyfriend, I was met by a 

policewoman encouraging me to apply for a protection order against the former partner over filing 

a case against violence – as if a piece of paper ever stopped him from being violent again.  

The Mail & Guardian (2020) states that,  

51% of women in [South Africa] SA say they’ve experienced GBV, with 76% men saying 

they’ve perpetrated GBV at one stage in their lives. A similar study revealed that one in 

five women reported that they have experienced violence at the hands of a partner… 

Femicide is five times higher in South Africa than the global average… At the start of level 

3 lockdown, [due to the Covid-19 pandemic], 21 women and children were murdered in 

two weeks, leading to the president to cite ‘…two devastating epidemics: Covid-19 and 

GBV’ (Ramafoko, 2020: n.pn.).  



7 
 

Even with the alarming GBV rates against children and women in South Africa, few and 

ineffective legal measures have been adopted and put in place to ensure and guarantee the safety 

of women and children when cases of GBV are reported to the police (Centre for the Study of 

Violence and Reconciliation, 2016). Looking at the statistics by M&G (2020) above, it is inevitable 

to consider the devastating effect that the Covid-19 pandemic has had in exacerbating GBV related 

cases against children and women. At least six of the 21 women were murdered by either their 

current or ex-lover (Mokobo, 2020). As a humanist, feminist, activist, and an individual with 

personal experience of surviving GBV, I noticed a rarely visited oversight in the fight against 

gender-based violence, which is the role played by black women from traditional, cultural, and 

economic perspectives in perpetuating GBV, specifically in intimate partner relationships. As 

such, I embarked on this autoethnographic inquiry to investigate how I, a black South African 

woman, possibly perpetuated and enabled GBV in a former intimate partner relationship.   

Using autoethnography and Boal’s Rituals and Masks, this inquiry aimed to explore how learned 

helplessness, resulting from the Battered Woman Syndrome (BWS) and structural factors, 

contributes towards a woman knowingly or unknowingly perpetuating GBV in her intimate partner 

relationship.  

The practical steps taken towards fulfilling these aims included recalling battering experiences to 

use as prompts for the short scenes (rituals) that allowed for role (masks) exploration of the batterer 

and the battered persons. I created installations using Rituals and Masks to explore how the role 

played by the “battered” person enabled and perpetuated GBV due to structural factors; recorded 

and wrote journals to track thoughts and reflections of the experimental process; sat with self to 

listen to the body and mind; and consulted with a drama therapist to assist with processing and 

grounding whenever I deemed necessary.  

This inquiry aimed to explore how structural (economic, traditional and cultural factors) can 

encourage a black South African woman to intentionally or unintentionally enable and perpetuate 

GBV in her intimate partner relationship.  Using autoethnography and Boal’s Rituals and Masks, 

I aimed to explore how learned helplessness, resulting from the battered woman syndrome and 

structural factors, contributes towards a woman knowingly or unknowingly perpetuating GBV in 

her intimate partner relationship.  



8 
 

The goal was to find out whether Rituals and Masks (Boal, 2008) could bring awareness to the 

victim-perpetuator about the duality of the role they may be playing in the events leading to them 

becoming victims of GBV in intimate partner relationships. I used Boal’s (2008) technique of 

Rituals and Masks as a single-player and facilitator.  Boal (2008) describes Rituals and Masks as 

a technique that is concerned about exposing “...the superstructures, the rituals which reify all 

human relationships, and the masks of behaviour that those rituals impose on each person 

according to the roles he plays in society and the rituals he must perform” (2008: 134). I used 

Rituals and Masks to experiment on several scenarios, which I drew from my own biographical 

experience. These scenarios all relate to situations where a GBV victim intentionally or 

unintentionally perpetuates violence in her intimate partner relationship. The intention was to 

disrupt these rituals – and masks - through initiating a change in victim-perpetuator actions and to 

interrogate the causality of the intentional/unintentional enabling of GBV in an intimate partner 

relationship.  

Suffice to note that this autoethnographic inquiry speaks only on behalf of the researcher’s 

personal experiences of GBV in her former intimate partner relationship. I made use of only my 

own personal experiences even when experimenting with Rituals and Masks. This research process 

does not speak for the collective of black South African women who are victims and survivors of 

GBV.  

Although extensive research has been conducted from various fields of studies, this inquiry is not 

comprehensive in its coverage of the plethora of published literature and years of debates in this 

issue because existing literature lacks rigorous scrutiny of the duality of being either an intentional 

or unintentional victim-perpetuator/ victim-enabler of GBV in intimate partner relationships. This 

research, therefore, looked at how traditional, cultural, and economic factors influence the victim-

enabler / victim-perpetuator role played by a black South African woman towards 

intentionally/unintentionally enabling GBV in her former intimate partner relationship. 

 

Problem Statement  

Sigsworth (2008) defines GBV as an act of violence that results in or is likely to result in physical, 

sexual, or psychological harm and suffering to women. The acts of violence can present themselves 



9 
 

as threats, “coercion or arbitrary deprivations of liberty, where occurring in public or in private 

life” (Sigsworth, 2008: 5). The various acts of violence include “spousal battery; sexual abuse, 

including of female children; dowry-related violence; rape, including marital rape; female genital 

mutilation/cutting and other traditional practices harmful to women; non-spousal violence; sexual 

violence related to exploitation; sexual harassment and intimidation at work, in school and 

elsewhere; trafficking in women; and forced prostitution,” and can occur in family, community, 

public and private spaces (Sigsworth, 2008: 5-6). 

Heise, Ellsberg and Gottmoeller (2002) report that researchers from various fields have used an 

ecological framework to study the relationship between personal, situational, and sociocultural 

factors that unite to cause abuse. This framework can be divided into four concentric circles: 

The innermost circle represents the biological and personal history that each individual 

brings to his or her behaviour in relationships. The second circle represents the immediate 

context in which abuse takes place: frequently the family or other intimate or acquaintance 

relationship. The third circle represents the institutions and social structures, both formal 

and informal, in which relationships are embedded in neighbourhoods, the workplace, 

social networks, and peer groups. The fourth, outermost circle is the economic and social 

environment, including cultural norms (Heise, et al., 2002: 7).  

In this model, Heise, et al. (2002) report, violence against women results from the interaction of 

factors at different levels of the social environment. The drivers of GBV in the South African 

context include a culture of violence that has made male superiority a norm. This resulted in some 

men displaying entitlement towards having consented and unconsented sexual relations with 

women; a rather harsh reinforcing of roles and hierarchy; women with low social value, power, 

and influence; and an association of displaying and performing masculinity in a form of exerting 

power and control over women (Saferspaces, 2014).   

Looking at the South African context, I have identified that violence against women intersects at 

cultural, economic, and traditional levels. A study of GBV in South Africa conducted by the Centre 

for the Study of Violence and Reconciliation (2016) reports the influences of culture, tradition, 

and religion on GBV in SA, asserting that “culturally, males are often placed in powerful positions 



10 
 

in relation to women due to practices such as lobola1, ukuthwala2” (2016:8). The study reveals 

that, culturally, it has become a norm for women to fundamentally hold a subservient position to 

men through socialization into conforming to cultural and religious practices, though some of the 

practices promote and tolerate GBV directly or indirectly (Centre for the Study of Violence and 

Reconciliation, 2016). Furthermore, it is often difficult for women who are economically 

dependent on their partners to leave abusive relationships, due to a lack of resource security for 

basic needs.  On the other hand, educated women entering labour markets represent a loss of power 

and authority exercised by men over women through the roles of household provider and protector, 

leading to a difficulty of men expressing and performing their ‘complete’ masculinity (Centre for 

the Study of Violence and Reconciliation, 2016). 

Although the South African government has passed various national and regional legal laws such 

as the 1998 Domestic Violence Act; the 1998 Maintenance Acts; the 2012 Criminal Law 

Amendment Act and the 2011 Protection from Harassment Act, to protect women and children 

against gendered violence, South African government agencies remain poor at implementing these 

laws to protect the livelihoods of victims of GBV (Centre for the Study of Violence and 

Reconciliation, 2016). Personal narratives shared by GBV victims on #Unpacked with Relebogile 

Mabotja (an S3, formally SABC 3, and YouTube Channel reality talk show) reveal that they have 

received poor service delivery from police stations when opening cases against their abusive lovers 

(Mabotja, 2021), similar to the service I received when attempting to press charges against an 

abusive ex-boyfriend.  

Various government and Non-Governmental Organisations have implemented interventions 

towards addressing GBV. Pedro (2019), reported on 18 studies with a total of 21 interventions 

aimed at reducing gender-based violence, with a total of 39,746 young people from areas with high 

statistics of HIV-positive individuals from Brazil, Ethiopia, Kenya, South Africa, Uganda, and 

Zimbabwe.  

 
1 Lobola – The cultural practice of paying a bride price.  
2 Ukuthwala – The practice of a man kidnapping a young girl to force her into marriage with or without her parents’ 
consent. Often referred to as bride kidnapping or wife abduction, ukuthwala is a traditional practice is parts of 
South Africa in which a girl is taken from her family and forces into marriage, typically without her consent (Moloi, 
2017).  



11 
 

A different study was conducted to address the “representations, emotions, and male violence 

against women” where 35 health and social professionals were interviewed and textual materials 

analysed, revealed that “anti-violence centre operators tend to view female victims and being 

helpless and completely under their male partner’s control” (Autiero et al., 2020: 8). Although the 

findings continue to report that some “female victims of gender violence can also exhibit collusive 

and manipulative behaviours” (Autiero et al., 2020: 7) through quoting a psychotherapist that was 

interviewed for this study, the study lacks a rigorous unpacking of how female victims of gendered 

violence can be intentional or unintentional instigators of the violence. The psychotherapist stated 

that,  

“It is a phenomenon that affects the couple, [and] it has to do with collusion that exists 

within the couple. Why not? One thing that is little talked about is that there are aspects 

related to women who can also be [involuntary] instigators of violence that they have to 

deal with and talk about. It should not be taboo to talk about this too. I think there is a need 

for skills, you cannot improvise. I do not speak of expertise, I speak of competence” 

(Autiero et al., 2020: 8). 

In my opinion, merely insinuating that GBV victims can be intentional or unintentional enablers 

and perpetuators of GBV without investigating these observations thoroughly is insufficient, 

because it continues to create an unexplored gap in the GBV discourse. It further affects the 

development of possible interventions that can be designed and/or implemented towards 

addressing this gap in the fight against GBV.  

“Women have been framed as both passive victims and resourceful, dynamic actors in the face of 

acute and gradual disasters” (Clissold, et al, 2020: 101).  I consider this phenomenon true for the 

crisis of GBV in South Africa. Embedded in the intricate social, political, economic, cultural, and 

traditional structures of South Africa are women who have submitted to power dynamics that 

privilege men, even in the face of their own demise.  I, therefore, see this as a kind of toxic 

femininity.  

Toxic femininity arises from a history of male-on-female and male-on-male dominance, where it 

is normal for women to not have power and/or influence over men. This is evidenced by Butler’s 

notion of gender performance that suggests that the gender performance script “…is always 

already determined within [a] regulatory frame, and the subject [gender performer] has a limited 



12 
 

number of ‘costumes’ from which to make a constrained choice of gender style” (Salih, 2006: 56). 

Butler’s suggestion proves gender to be a performance, “…that is, constituting the identity it is 

purported to be. In this sense, gender is always a doing, though not a doing by a subject who might 

be said to pre-exist the deed” (Salih, 2006: 56). Due to this, women adapted the retaliation 

approach against men, opting for more subtle approaches to get their way (Jones, 2019).  

Gender is the repeated stylisation of the body, a set of repeated acts within a highly rigid regulatory 

frame that congeal over time to produce the appearance of substance, of a natural sort of being 

competition for positions of favour. This aspect of toxic femininity is also evident in the ways boys 

and girls are raised. The perception that girls are delicate and fragile, while boys are macho and 

strong, encourages toxic femininity because girls are raised to compete for the male gaze. “We 

raise girls to see each other as competitors – not for jobs or accomplishments… - but for the 

attention of men” (Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, 2015: n.pn). This aspect of toxic femininity exists 

in the same vein as internalized misogyny or internalized patriarchy by women. With this 

understanding of how women can internalize patriarchal systems, I deduce that women can also 

internalize and carry out acts that perpetuate and enable violence against women, even in intimate 

partner relationships. The issue is an information gap in the scrutiny of GBV. Exploring it could 

assist women with identifying how these internalized toxic patriarchal traits may influence the 

roles they may be playing in perpetuating and enabling gendered violence against women. 

Therefore, this autoethnographic attempts to address this gap by examining only the researcher’s 

own experience of GBV.   

The narratives of women intentionally or unintentionally perpetuating GBV in intimate partner 

relationships are left untold and unrecorded as conversations around GBV often dwell on women 

being passive victims, but never enablers of GBV.  I believe these stories to be an essential puzzle 

piece in the fight against the GBV crisis in South Africa because they begin to address the role of 

women in enabling and perpetuating GBV.  They also address the systemic and cultural power 

dynamics held by women in the fight against gender-based violence.  

This phenomenon is something I have observed within myself, and assumed it has relevance within 

the bigger GBV discourse. I addressed it using Rituals and Masks. Rituals and Masks have not, in 

my knowledge, been used in an autoethnographic way to interrogate GBV. This inquiry, therefore, 

does not only address an oversight in the ongoing conversation about GBV. It also makes use of 



13 
 

the Applied Theatre tool of Rituals and Masks with autoethnography to address an avenue that has 

not yet been explored within the field of Applied Theatre.  

Research Questions  

Given the extensive problem with GBV in South Africa, coupled with my personal experience, I 

formulated my research question as follows:  

To what extent do structural (economic, traditional, and cultural) factors encourage a black South 

African woman to become an enabler of GBV in an intimate partner relationship? In what ways 

can autoethnography coupled with Boals’ concept of Rituals and Masks facilitate a reflexive 

platform for women displaying symptoms of the battered woman syndrome to disrupt and 

challenge the routine that ultimately leads to learned helplessness? In what ways does 

autoethnography and Rituals and Masks address structural factors to shift the experiences of 

women presenting battering symptoms?  In what ways do Rituals and Masks allow for 

vulnerability and introspection for a feminist who displayed symptoms of the battered woman 

syndrome, therefore developing learned helplessness and perpetuating GBV in a former intimate 

partner relationship?  

Context and individual-specific inquiry  

I have known black females who have lived through experiences and continue to survive the 

nightmare of gender-based violence in relationships and abusive marriages due to a lack of income 

for self-sustenance, traditional and cultural practices. These factors include the bazothini abantu 

syndrome3, the kuyabekezelwa emshadweni nasothandweni4 phrases, the akang’thandi 

mengang’shayi5, and due to the fear of being called umabuy’emendweni.  “If a woman decides to 

abandon her marriage, she is heavily castigated and labelled through idioms such as 

umabuyemendweni6 and umayehlulwa ngumendo7, a state that is often seen as struggle and battle” 

for the woman (Ncube and Moyo, 2011: 132). These expressions, argue Ncube and Moyo (2011), 

 
3 Bazothini abantu – the fear of “What will people say?” when wanting to make a decision or pursue new life 
ventures. 
4 Kuyabekezelwa emshadweni nasothandweni – you [woman] should persevere and endure in marriage and in 
relationships, regardless of the circumstances. 
5 akang’thandi mengang’shayi – “He does not love me if he does not beat me” sayings. 
6 umabuy’emendweni – the one who could not keep her marriage / the one who got defeated by marriage. 
7 Umayehlulwa ngumendo – the one defeated by marriage 



14 
 

are insulting and carry negative connotations that guilt-trip women into staying in abusive 

marriages, persuading women to endure abusive marriages. In their study, Ncube and Moyo report 

how Ndebele proverbs and idioms like the ones above “mirror a particular culture and tradition 

that imbues a spirit of submissiveness, perseverance and domesticity in women” (2011: 126). 

Ncube and Moyo (2011) assert that the philosophy communicated by some of these idioms is that 

in particular instances marriage is considered a rehabilitation centre “for vocal and outspoken 

women, which brings them to their place,” and in this domestication process, women are 

considered ‘good’ wives when they become obedient towards male authority and domination 

(Ncube and Moyo, 2011: 132). The derogatory proverbs and idiomatic expressions, according to 

Ncube and Moyo (2011), are expressed by the Ndebele society against women.  

 

Because society constitutes both men and women, it is clear that both men and women in the 

Ndebele culture uphold cultural practices that promote acts of gendered roles and stereotypes that 

encourage violence against women in intimate partner relationships. Although this study was 

conducted for the Ndebele cultural contexts, similarities were drawn between the Ndebele and 

Xhosa cultures as both groups form part of the Bantu people and share similar cultural practices 

and beliefs (Rajend Mesthrie, 1995). 

 

Mothers and aunts continue to teach their daughters about how enduring pain from abuse are 

attributes of a strong woman, implying that a black woman’s strength is measured by how much 

nonsense she can stomach from a man she is intimately involved with. In the Xhosa culture, this 

is done through a marriage tradition called ukuyalwa, where the bride and grooms’ family elders 

and close elderly family friends, come together to lecture the new bride about the dos and don’ts 

of her marriage journey ahead (Mbuyazi-Memani, 2017). I have seen women around me suffer 

from depression because they are scared to leave their relationships or marriages because they fear 

being called failures who could not keep a man. A study conducted by Mahlori, Byrne, and 

Mabude (2018) at the University of South Africa to determine perceptions of GBV among 

university staff reveals a significant increase in the rates of mild to severe depression among people 

who have been exposed to and victims of GBV. It is revealed in the investigation that victims of 

GBV were symptomatic of psychological effects such as depression, anxiety, lack of self-esteem, 

and posttraumatic stress symptoms (Mahlori et al., 2018).  



15 
 

Choi and Ting (2008: 838) argue towards the lack of reliable estimates of violence against women, 

however, “… strong empirical evidence has suggested that violence against women by intimate 

partners is widespread and serious in South Africa”. Boonzaier (2005) concludes in his study that 

the issue and results of woman abuse in South Africa require vast and broad research to explore 

various outcomes, possibilities, and solutions in support of the fight against GBV. Furthermore, it 

is essential to investigate multiple context-specific contributing factors that exacerbate violence 

against women in a country whose legacy from apartheid is a “culture of violence” (Boonzaier, 

2005: n.p.).  

Sutherland (2013) advocates for “a post-conflict pedagogy which recognizes and can account for 

pain and trauma of both sides through the creation of sustained discursive spaces which can 

provide a safe site for the playing-out of a multiplicity of identities”. She further asserts that applied 

theatre, “as a socially based art form which aims to construct meaning through performance 

processes, can therefore shape and contest some of the meanings acquired around important social 

issues” (Sutherland. 2013: 181). Applied theatre coupled with autoethnography permits 

researchers “to speak about what is left beneath the surface and not spoken about” (Sutherland, 

2013: 181). Conducting this autoethnographic inquiry as an Applied Drama and Theatre (ADT) 

scholar permitted me to conduct a context and individual-specific inquiry of a subject matter that 

is often left unexplored, in support of Sutherland’s (2013) call for a post-conflict critical pedagogy 

in the field of ADT.  

These personal and theoretical motives informed the reason behind the use of rituals and masks 

for this inquiry. These tools offered me a better understanding of how constant exposure to 

repetitive abusive scenarios led to me displaying symptoms of a battered woman. By deeply 

interrogating my own experience, my habits, and the role I unintentionally played in enabling the 

violence, I was able to outline clearly how and why I perpetuated and enabled GBV in an intimate 

partner relationship. 

 

Theoretical Framework  

The three main theories forming this research are the Battered Woman Syndrome, toxic femininity, 

and Rituals and Masks; and this inquiry sat at the intersection between the three theories.  



16 
 

Therapeutic potential of Boal’s work  

Pioneered by Brazilian theatre practitioner, drama theorist and political activist Augusto Boal, 

Theatre of the Oppressed is an art method that “grew out of a determined battle to make socially 

engaged, life-affirming theatre in a climate of extreme repression” (Babbage, 2018: 2). Boal’s 

development of the Cop-in-the-Head technique blurred the boundaries between theatre and therapy 

(Boal, 1990: 39).   

“Boal defines theatre as the first discovery of humankind. Theatre emerges at the moment 

in which the human being recognizes the s/he can see himself or herself; s/he recognizes 

who s/he is and is not; s/he imagines who s/he could become. For Boal, the therapeutic 

effects lie within the dynamic of seeing and being seen, in the recognition of the self and 

the other, and in the subsequent expressions of desire for change in everyday life” 

(Feldhendler, 1994: 93-94).  

Feldhendler, (1994: 87) writing about Boal’s keynote speech given at a convention by the 

International Association of Group Psychotherapy themed Encounter or Alienation?: The 

Importance of the Group in Modern Society, asserts that “Boal described dramaturgy as the origin 

of human action and drama as the place where deep psychological processes are expressed”. 

Inspired by the convention, Boal wrote a book titled Méthode Boal de théâtre et de thérapie: l’arc-

en-ciel du desir, recounting the differences of working with Latin American participants to 

working with people from western Europe (Feldhendler, 1994). Boal’s work with Latin 

Americans, at the time, focused predominantly on systemic issues, while western Europeans “… 

were not exposed to immediate external violence [,] they had, nonetheless, internalized an 

oppressive ‘cop’ into their own heads. He adopted his techniques to find out how these ‘cops’ had 

gotten into their heads and to develop approaches to get them out again” (Feldhendler, 1994: 88). 

As Boal’s practice expanded, his focus shifted from being product-oriented to becoming process-

oriented, moving into terrain where theatre and therapy overlap (Feldhendler, 1994).  

Boal’s work has been compared to the work of Jacob Levy Moreno, creator of psychodrama and 

group psychotherapy: “forum theatre, for instance, can be seen as a form of sociodrama in which 

‘the true subject… is the group and not the different individuals’” [(Moreno, 1974: 91) in 



17 
 

(Feldhendler, 1994: 89)].  Jonathan Fox, a psychodramatist and founder of Playback Theatre in the 

USA asserts that, 

… sociodrama is based upon the tacit assumption that the group formed by the audience is 

already organized by the social and cultural roles which in some degree all the carriers of 

the culture share…It is therefore incidental who the individuals are, or of whom the group 

is composed, or how large their number is. It is the group as a whole which has to be put 

upon the stage to work out its problem, because the group in sociodrama corresponds to 

the individual in psychodrama (Fox, 1987: 18). 

A technique coined by Boal, named Cop-in-the-Head is also comparable to a psychodramatic 

method in a sense that,  

When setting a scene or situation, for instance, Boal now demands that the attribution of 

the roles be done by the protagonist of the forum scene, a standard procedure in a 

psychodrama. Participants of a Boal workshop in Giessen in January 1991, remarked that 

the techniques of Cop-in-the-Head had to do with ‘freeing spontaneity’; for Moreno, the 

fundamental stance of psychodrama is based on the development of ‘creative spontaneity’ 

(Feldhendler, 1994: 89).  

I mention this report because it outlines how Boal’s work developed to become process oriented. 

Taking cognizance of how his techniques can have therapeutic goals – his work differs from 

traditional therapy where a clear client-therapist relationship is apparent with specified and 

targeted therapeutic goals given a timeline within which the goal should be achieved. Taking into 

cognizance “the necessity to consider psychic realities and to integrate them into the work process” 

– as per Boal’s suggestion (Feldhendler, 1994: 88), this inquiry enabled me to gain awareness of 

the ways in which I intentionally and unintentionally enabled and perpetuated GBV in an intimate 

partner relationship due to cultural, traditional and economic influences that positioned me to 

become a victim-enabler of GBV in an intimate partner relationship.  

Boal’s work comprises multiple tools developed for the purpose of conscientizing oppressed 

individuals in various contexts, and to attempt to dismantle systems that upkeep the oppression. 

Central to his work is the role of the joker (Boal, 2008). In summary, Schutzman (2006) describes 

the joker as a facilitator who challenges and maximizes “possibilities for the articulation (and 



18 
 

rearticulation) of uncommon beliefs, working towards a vision of community that thrives on 

constant reformulation [ideologies]” (2006: 143). As the sole participant in this inquiry, I played 

the roles of the joker and the performer of the ritual. The roles of the joker/facilitator and the role 

of the performer co-existed in a state of metaxis. Boal (1995) outlines metaxis as:  

[T]he state of belonging completely and simultaneously to two different, autonomous 

worlds: the image of the reality and the reality of the image. The participant shared and 

belongs to these two autonomous worlds; their reality and the image of their reality, which 

she herself has created (Boal, 1995: 43).  

The use of the concept of metaxis in the performance of Rituals and Masks outlined my dual 

awareness of being present in the performance as it unfolded, while simultaneously playing the 

role of the joker to facilitate the interplay between performing the ritual, witnessing and observing 

myself, and taking note of the data coming from the performance. The joker in Boal’s Theatre of 

the Oppressed mediates between  

…the worlds of performance space and beyond it, and the workshop world and the external 

world. [T]he state of belonging completely and simultaneously to two different, 

autonomous worlds: the image of the reality and the reality of the image. The participant 

shares and belongs to these two autonomous worlds; their reality and the image of their 

reality, which she herself has created. Boal, 1995: 43).  

The role of the joker was significant for this inquiry because it oversaw the facilitation of the 

performance. I expand further on how I played the duality of the roles of the oppressed and 

oppressor in Rituals and Masks, alongside the role of the joker in section 3.  

 

 Toxic Masculinity in Women / Toxic Femininity  

I deem it necessary to unpack the concept of toxic masculinity before expanding on toxic 

femininity. Unpacking toxic masculinity reveals how patriarchal systems maintain cyclic 

behaviour that is internalised and upheld by both men and women, creating rituals that effect masks 

of internalised patriarchy. Toxic masculinity made its appearance in the 1990s to encapsulate 

“destructive behaviours adapted by men in trying to achieve notions of successful manhood” 



19 
 

(McCann, 2020: 2). Kupers) defines toxic masculinity as “…the constellation of socially 

regressive male traits that serve to foster domination, the devaluation of women, homophobia, and 

wanton violence” (2005: 714). The term hegemonic masculinities – referring to “the way men’s 

power is systematically institutionalized, a dominance bolstered by men themselves” – predates 

the term toxic masculinity (McCann, 2020: 2). Connell, (1987) in an attempt to outline the 

systematic domination of men over women – as patriarchy theory suggests – and over men – over 

subordinate masculinities, suggests that “the public face of hegemonic masculinity is not 

necessarily what powerful men are, but what sustains their power and what large numbers of men 

are motivated to support” (1987: 185). McCann and Connell’s theorization supplements Butler’s 

(1981) theorisation of gender performance and Boal’s (1990) notion of structural systems 

operating in ways that socialise people into the masks of identity; because toxic patriarchal systems 

are upheld by an internalisation and performance of toxic masculinities by men and women, 

therefore initiating the creation of toxic femininity. 

Although hegemonic masculinity is still evident within institutions, social culture and in 

masculinity studies, toxic masculinity is continuing to grab attention rapidly. It is  

often used in a way that echoes the intent of hegemonic masculinity, to understand how 

gender norms also harm some men [and women] … Popular media abounds with examples 

of how toxic masculinity explains men’s violence, the misogyny… men’s risk-taking 

behaviour and more (McCann, 2020: 4).  

Contemporary scholars such as bell hooks, Emma Watson, and Terry Kupers have played a 

prominent role in advancing the discourse on toxic masculinity and femininity, as well as its impact 

on both individuals and society at large (hooks, 2004; Watson, 2014; Kupers, 2019). Hooks (2004), 

in particular, has emphasized the need for a comprehensive examination of the ways in which 

patriarchal norms and expectations are internalized and reinforced by both men and women, and 

the importance of actively working to disrupt and dismantle these systems of oppression. Watson 

(2014) has also been vocal about the role of toxic masculinity in perpetuating gender inequality, 

and has called for a shift in societal attitudes towards a more inclusive and equal definition of 

masculinity. Similarly, Kupers (2019) has focused on the ways in which toxic masculinity can 

contribute to the development of mental health issues and trauma among men and how addressing 

these issues is crucial in order to promote gender equality. 



20 
 

Kimmel and Katz, both scholars of masculinity studies, have greatly contributed to the 

understanding of the negative effects of toxic masculinity, with Kimmel's work emphasizing the 

ways in which societal expectations of masculinity contribute to discrimination and violence 

against marginalized groups (Kimmel, 1996; Katz, 2004). Similarly, Katz (2004) has highlighted 

the link between toxic masculinity and issues such as sexual assault and domestic violence, while 

also underscoring the responsibility of men in working to challenge and disrupt these harmful 

patterns. Both Kimmel and Katz have also emphasized the importance of fostering a more 

inclusive and equitable definition of masculinity, that is not harmful to individuals and society. 

Furthermore, their works have extensively stressed on the power dynamics at play in the society 

and how toxic masculinity contributes to the maintenance of patriarchy and marginalization of 

marginalized groups. 

In the case of the intimate-partner relationship recounted in this inquiry, the perpetrator of the GBV 

on me is also a product of hegemonic masculinity that instilled both positive and negative aspects 

of masculinity. Being raised in a similar community to the one I grew up in, it is apparent that he 

witnessed, learned, and absorbed prescribed performances and expressions of his gender identity 

through the lens of an autocratic male figure, with an expectation of exercising the dominance of 

his masculinity on a docile and submissive young woman. This observation, however, does not 

excuse, justify, or condone the violent acts carried out by the man. Without nullifying various 

underlying factors I believe to have contributed towards him becoming abusive, this point of view 

merely demonstrates how he too was partially influenced by the context-specific structural factors 

that influenced the identity formation and articulation of his masculinity and manhood, as 

suggested by Butler’s (1994) analysis of how people are socialised into taking on gender roles that 

are prescribed to them as some form of blueprint around which gender identity and performance 

is framed and created from.  

Toxic femininity, the equivalent of toxic masculinity, according to McCann (2020) sits on the 

spectrum of mainstream discussions about toxic masculinity. It can be seen as “… a jumping-off 

point from which to theorise attachments that reinforce the gendered [masculine] power structure” 

(McCann, 2020: 2). The term toxic femininity, according to McCann, (2020), can be viewed and 

used in three perspectives: 



21 
 

1. Toxic femininity can be employed for an anti-feminist perspective as a reaction to the use 

of the term ‘toxic-masculinity,’ suggesting that women also possess inherent toxic traits 

like those of toxic men. 

2. The term is used within the Men’s Rights Activist (MRA) discourse to counteract 

understandings of power as gendered with anti-feminist intentions. 

3. The third use of toxic femininity, which is not as reactive as the first two uses, is slowly 

being taken seriously by feminists to begin to question female behaviour that is adherent 

to traditional gender roles and stereotypes instilling notions of subservience to women 

(McCann, 2020).  

“In the limited scholarly references to toxic femininity currently in circulation, the term is also 

used to reflect the internalization and reification of patriarchal ideas and norms” (McCann, 2020: 

9).  

Contemporary scholars like Kimberle Crenshaw (1989), hooks (1981) and others have explored 

the concept of intersectionality as it pertains to toxic masculinity and toxic femininity. 

Intersectionality is a theoretical perspective that emphasizes the ways in which harmful stereotypes 

and expectations associated with these constructs intersect with other systems of oppression, such 

as race, class, and sexual orientation (Crenshaw, 1989; hooks, 1981). This conceptualization posits 

that individuals who belong to multiple marginalized groups may experience a compounded form 

of discrimination and harm, which is not adequately captured by examining toxic masculinity or 

toxic femininity in isolation. This perspective highlights the need for a comprehensive examination 

of the intersections of various forms of oppression, in order to fully grasp the complexity of 

individual experiences and to address the harm caused by toxic masculinity and toxic femininity 

(Bowleg, 2008; Weber, 2018). 

In support of this view, hooks (1981) emphasised the importance of considering intersectionality 

in understanding the experiences of marginalized groups. hooks (1981) has also provided a 

theoretical framework for intersectionality by highlighting the need for considering the interplay 

of various forms of oppression, including, class, race, and gender, in order to fully understand the 

experiences of marginalized individuals.  

Although these theorists do not directly and necessarily expand on toxic masculinity and 

femininity as per this report’s interest, it is worth acknowledging that because I, as the researcher-



22 
 

subject of this inquiry, by virtue of being classified as a black woman by birth right, belong to one 

of the most marginalised groups globally. Suffice to acknowledge that the question of determining 

the most oppressed group globally is a multifaceted and nuanced one, as the manifestations of 

oppression are varied and may affect different individuals and communities in distinct ways 

(Crenshaw, 1991). Furthermore, the intersectionality of identities may exacerbate experiences of 

oppression, making it challenging to make definitive comparative statements (hooks, 1981). 

However, the academic literature extensively documents the disproportionately high levels of 

discrimination and marginalization that Black women, particularly in the Global South, experience 

on the basis of their race and gender (Crenshaw, 1991; hooks, 1981). For instance, research has 

established that Black women are disproportionately impacted by poverty, restricted access to 

education and healthcare, and are at a heightened risk of gender-based violence, among other forms 

of systemic oppression (Crenshaw, 1991; hooks, 1981). 

The oppressive intersectionalities that are relevant for this inquiry are, therefore, expanded on in 

the unpacking of the structural factors that contribute towards the becoming a victim-enabler of 

GBV in an intimate partner relationship.  Furthermore, the framing of this research, as far as toxic 

femininity is concerned, made use of the third viewpoint of the application of toxic femininity 

stated above. This viewpoint shares similar sentiments with this inquiry in relation to 

understanding how internalized toxic masculinity traits that develop toxic femininity can 

contribute towards a woman perpetuating and enabling GBV in intimate partner relationships. 

 

GBV in intimate partner relationships 

Feminists have used multiple terms to articulate gendered violence, including “battered women, 

violence against women, domestic violence, intimate partner violence, family violence, and 

gender-based violence” (Hall, 2014: 3). I will expand on IPV to contextualize the definition of 

GBV for this inquiry. 

How one defines IPV determines how one measures it, which in turn affects what conclusions 

can be drawn about the prevalence, patterns, gender differences, and health consequences of 

IPV… the definition of IPV is largely driven by one’s own conceptualization of the problem, 



23 
 

which, in turn, is dependent on one's background, training, experience, research methodology, 

and political agenda (Nicolaidis & Paranjape, 2009: 20). 

Nicolaidis and Paranjape (2009) report that advocate researchers define IPV as continuous 

behavioural patterns where one of the main practices for a batterer to exert and exercise power and 

dominance over their intimate partner is through violence, regardless of the batterer and victim’s 

gender identities and whether the batterer and the victim are in a heterosexual, homosexual, or 

bisexual relationship. This IPV definition’s archetype “… is that of a controlling, jealous man 

progressively taking away his female partner’s self-esteem, independence, resources, social 

support network, sense of safety, and health” (Nicolaidis & Paranjape: 2009: 21).  

Public health utilizes a system they have in place, whose goal is to enumerate, supervise, and 

mitigate factors risking the health of populations, including emotional abuse – particularly if it 

affects the wellbeing of an individual. This system influences public health’s perspective on IPV, 

focusing especially on “… victimization and its health consequences, and less on the complexities 

that exist within individual relationships” (Nicolaidis & Paranjape: 2009: 21). Many healthcare 

provider training program see IPV as a repetition of coercive acts whose goals are to dominate and 

exert power over a partner while screening procedures in healthcare require limited information 

with little emphasis detailing the presence of patterned coercive behaviour (Nicolaidis & 

Paranjape: 2009). Furthermore, the definition of IPV and its screening process varies across 

various healthcare specialties. There will be no expansions made on the adapted definitions across 

medical specialties because they do not constitute or assist the purpose of the context of the 

phenomenon at hand.  

Influenced by the work of Murray Straus and colleagues, family conflict researchers on college 

students and general populations understand IPV as violence inflicted as “… a response to 

intermittent conflicts and is perpetrated by both men and women in similar rates. Here, the focus 

is on specific behaviours perpetrated by either partner” (Nicolaidis & Paranjape: 2009: 21). 

Contrary to this definition, feminist researchers, according to Nicolaidis & Paranjape (2009: 20), 

comprehend IPV as “a pattern of coercive behaviours meant to establish power and control” by 

males using physical and emotional abuse over and against their female partners. 

To frame a context-specific definition for this inquiry, I coupled the 1993 United Nations 

Declaration on the Elimination of Violence Against Women’s definition of GBV as:  



24 
 

“Any act of gender-based violence that results in physical, sexual or psychological harm 

or suffering to women, including threats of such acts, coercion or arbitrary deprivations of 

liberty, whether occurring in public or private life,” (Health and Human Rights Info, 2013: 

n.pn),  

with my definition of IPV, which is:  

an act of violence – physical and emotional – whether cyclical or once-off, that is 

performed by a person on their spouse, lover, or partner. 

Together, these definitions define what gender-based violence in intimate partner relationships is 

for the purpose of this study, focusing particularly on black South African males carrying out the 

violent act, and black South African women being the receiving victims.  

 

Battered woman syndrome (BWS)  

Suffice to note that BWS is a clinical diagnosis term with extensive research, and in this inquiry, 

BWS is not applied pathologically and diagnostically towards GBV survivors and victims of 

Intimate Partner Violence (IPV).  

Being cognizant of the researcher’s scope of practice as an applied drama and theatre researcher, 

BWS was used as an approach to demonstrate how structural factors (economic, traditional and 

cultural) operate and foster a platform whereby IPV victims may exhibit symptoms outlined by 

BWS theorists. 

 Defining Battered Woman Syndrome (BWS):  

Pioneered by Lenore Walker in the late 1970s and early 1980s, BWS is defined by Savage as: 

… battering relationship as a ‘cycle of violence’ that consists of three stages. The first stage 

is a ‘tension building phase,’ in which the woman experiences a minimal amount of 

physical and verbal attacks by her spouse/ lover (Walker 1981 in Savage, 2006: 762). 

Savage (2006) expands on how the woman normally minimises the severity of the attacks while 

appeasing her attacker during this phase. Stage two, the ‘battering phase’ happens when the 

batterer becomes incredibly violent to the woman, making this stage “the acute battering incident” 



25 
 

(Savage, 2006: 762). Walker (1981) suggests that it is the clear ‘lack of control and its major 

destructiveness’ that distinguishes this incident from the ones that occur in phase one (Walker 

1981 in Savage 2006). This is followed by the third stage, the ‘honeymoon phase’, which is 

characterised by the batterer showing remorse and ‘contract loving behaviour’ where they beg for 

forgiveness, convincing the woman that he will not hurt her again through actions showing his 

determination to change (Savage, 2006).  

Walker (1981) asserts that a woman who experiences repeated cycles of violence may develop 

learned helplessness, which is a psychological state of mind  

“... first introduced by the psychologist Martin Seligman, that serves as one explanation for 

why the women do not leave their abusers. According to Walker (1981), the women believe 

that they lack all control over their abusive situation and feel it is impossible to escape, 

even when escape is in fact a possibility. Feeling she has no way out of the situation, the 

woman becomes increasingly passive, and her motivation and the will to get out of the 

relationship diminish” (Walker, 1981 in Savage, 2006: 762).  

Walker (1981) outlines that the origins of spousal violence in Western communities stem from 

how law and religion permitted husbands to use assault on their wives as disciplinary measures 

because husbands would be held responsible for their wives’ actions if those actions were deemed 

unlawful or blasphemous. This demonstrates how wife-beating was an acceptable norm 

historically as long as it did not result in physical injuries (Walker, 1981). The normalizing of 

males assaulting their spouses in western communities is synonymous with the normalization of 

IPV embedded in the black South African cultural context.  

Having been victims of intimate abuse over a prolonged period, battered women have been 

reported to display provocative behaviour towards their abusers, the batterers as though they are 

asking to be abused (Walker, 1981). MacDonald (1971) offers a victim-precipitation theory to 

justify the battered women’s attempts to manipulate their batterers into inflicting physical violence 

on them as a means to gain power and control over their own lives, however, these attempts are 

generally unfruitful. These manipulations succeed in prolonging the lives of the battered women 

and in influencing the time and place in which the violence ensues, though they are powerless at 

preventing the beating. As a result, the victims may be accused as the cause of the violence, leading 



26 
 

to an increased negative impact of the psychological effects this experience may have on the 

women (Walker, 1981). 

Scholars who critically examined the theory of BWS have had extensive debates about the 

psychological symptoms that constitute BWS, arguing that not all battered women experience the 

same violence patterns as outlined by Walker’s cycle of violence (Easteal and Stubbs, 1992). 

Another noteworthy problem area of BWS is that it does “…not confront the larger question of 

what might be considered to be reasonable, but rather constructs a different standard of behaviour 

against which a (reasonable) battered woman is to be measured” (Easteal and Stubbs, 1992: 360). 

This is a problem area because it risks benefiting only the women who fit the stereotype of the 

kind of battered woman outlined by Walker (1981), while other battered women whose symptoms 

are not captured in the one-size-fits-all symptomology of BWS could be greatly disadvantaged due 

to not meeting the criteria of a reasonable battered woman.  

As Easteal and Stubbs (1992) succinctly put it, “the danger lies not in using BWS as descriptive 

of the experiences of some battered women, but as prescriptive of what are reasonable responses 

for battered women” (1992: 360). The third issue about BWS is that it focuses largely on the 

psychological characteristics of a subset of women who fit the reasonable symptomology of BWS 

to justify their behaviour, without paying much attention to various social and structural factors 

that limit women’s options, making it difficult and in some cases impossible for them to leave 

violent relationships. “Rather the woman’s actions are interpreted in the context of her 

psychological (dys)functioning” (Easteal and Stubbs, 1992: 360).  

Easteal and Stubbs (1992) argue that the lack of rigorous scrutiny of the cultural and systemic 

influences in the creation of battered women tend to lean toward an unhelpful “apparent gender 

neutrality of the term learned helplessness” (1992: 360). They continue to substantiate the 

argument by asserting that,  

“The issue is not whether learned helplessness is gendered, but rather that in being invoked 

in the context of battered women it reinforces extant stereotypes about women’s passivity. 

More importantly, the validity of the concept itself has been questioned within the 

psychological literature, and the illogicality of explaining a purposive action – killing – by 

resort to helplessness has been highlighted” (1992: 360).  



27 
 

Lathan (n.d.), in agreement with the criticism of BWS, argues that although Walker’s (1981) Cycle 

of Abuse theory aims to reduce IPV victim-blaming by enunciating the psychological factors 

preventing victims from leaving abusive relationships, the theory oftentimes promotes victim-

blaming, insinuating that victims can and should help prevent the violence. “BWS is often blamed 

for keeping alive the question ‘Why do women stay?’ which continues to rest responsibility for 

ongoing abusive relationship on the victim, who may also be constrained by children, economics, 

optimism, and even, feelings of love, care, or concern for their partner” (Lathan, n.d.: 4). 

In more recent years, contemporary scholars such as Stark and Lyon have expanded upon the 

concept of BWS, critiquing its limitations and highlighting the importance of considering the 

broader socio-political and structural context of IPV (Stark, 2007; Lyon, 2015). Stark (2007), for 

example, notes that the concept of BWS tends to pathologize victims of domestic violence and 

places undue emphasis on the behaviours of the victim, rather than the perpetrator of the abuse. 

Additionally, Lyon (2015) has argued that the BWS concept primarily focuses on women and does 

not take into account the experiences of men and children who are also victims of IPV. As a result, 

these scholars have supported the use of ‘intimate partner violence’ to encompass both men and 

women as victims and to shift the focus on the perpetrator (Stark, 2007; Lyon, 2015). They also 

stress on the fact that BWS should not be used as a legal strategy in the criminal justice system 

and that it may not be the best way to understand the complexities of domestic violence and that it 

could be used to justify lenient sentences for the offender. 

In keeping with contemporary scholarship on the BWS research, this study employed Walker's 

(1981) theoretical framework in its examination of the phenomenon under investigation, given 

its particular conceptualization of BWS aligns closely with the experiences of the research 

subject, aims, and objectives. 

 

  

 

 

 

 



28 
 

Section 2: Research Method  

I used autoethnography, which is “research, writing, and method that connect the autobiographical 

and personal to the cultural, social, and political” (Ellis, 2004: xix). The tool used to explore this 

methodology is Rituals and Masks, whose aim is to disrupt social masks and rituals that operate to 

keep oppressive systems in place (Boal, 2002). 

Autoethnography is a qualitative research and writing approach that systematically (graphy) 

investigates one’s personal experience (auto) to comprehend cultural experience (ethno) (Ellis, 

2004; Jones, 2008). This method challenges the conventional and traditional approaches of 

conducting research and the way people are represented through searching for “…more 

transparent, reflexive, and creative ways” to conduct and report their research findings (Spry, 

2001; Adams, Jones, Ellis, 2015: 21). Autoethnography sees research as “a political, socially-just 

and socially conscious act” which does not detach the research from the researcher; and the 

“…personal from the relational, cultural, and political [–] qualitative researchers embrace methods 

that [recognize] and [use] personal-cultural entanglements” (Ellis et al., 2011: 1; Adams, et al., 

2015: 21).  

Conducting autoethnographic research requires the researcher to transcribe their past experiences 

“retroactively and selectively” (Ellis, et al., 2011: 2). Apart from their personal experiences, the 

researcher could conduct interviews with other people, consult with various text and information 

sources such as journals, photographs, video and voice recordings, artworks, artifacts, and self-

observational data to assist with recalling or the researching process that an auto ethnographer 

undergoes (Ellis, et al, 2011). Conducting autoethnography 

“…offers nuanced, complex, and specific knowledge about particular lives, experiences, 

and relationships rather than general information about large groups of people. Qualitative 

research focuses on human intentions, motivations, emotions and actions, rather than 

generating demographic information and general descriptions of interaction” (Adams et 

al., 2015: 21).  

 

 



29 
 

Ethnographic Refusal   

Ethnographic refusal “is a method whereby researchers and research participants together decide 

not to make particular information available for use within the academy. It is intended to redirect 

academic analysis away from harmful pain-based narratives that obscure slow violence and 

towards the structures, institutions, and practices that engender those narratives” (Zahara, 2016: 

n.p.n.). Zahara (2016) reports that the concept of refusal has been criticized and dismissed by 

anthropologists, claiming that it produces “incomplete depictions of marginalized groups”. 

Contrary to this notion, indigenous theorists reframed the concept of refusal as a decolonizing 

research approach because it considers and attends to the ethical implications of conducting 

research for participants and their communities (Zahara, 2016). Practicing refusal, for indigenous 

theorists, “…necessitates community collaboration and control over research projects… the 

method is centrally concerned with a community’s right to self-representation” (Zahara, 2016: 

n.p.n.). 

As the researcher and subject for this inquiry, I used ethnographic refusal to grant myself 

permission to refuse to disclose certain information about the battering experience I am 

investigating, the Rituals and Masks performance exploration process, my reflections and findings 

from the entire experience wherever I deem it necessary to refuse disclosing this information. 

Refusal, for this inquiry, is an act of granting myself agency to what I choose to subject myself to, 

opt-out of, or have information reported back or kept out of the academic document.  

 

Ethical Considerations  

As the subject and researcher for this inquiry, I practiced beneficence to ensure my safety and 

wellbeing. I did this by intentionally allowing myself to not go to certain personal, psychological, 

and emotional places to protect myself from the anticipated resulting psychological and emotional 

harm and trauma. I exercised autonomy through being careful and pedantic with the personal 

narratives I chose to share and omit to the degree of my comfortability. I thought it unnecessary to 

use pseudonyms because this is an autoethnographic study, making it apparent to any reader that 

the inquiry is based on the researcher’s past experiences. Instead, I opted to not include sensitive 

information I am uncomfortable disclosing. It was and still is imperative that I practice autonomy 

throughout this practice because not taking agency would be inflicting and perpetuating emotional 

and psychological harm onto myself - the very act I am arguing against.  



30 
 

Rituals and Masks  

Rituals and Masks is a technique  

[consisting] precisely in revealing the superstructures, the rituals which reify all human 

relationships, and the masks of behaviour that those rituals impose on each person 

according to the roles he plays in society and the rituals he must perform (Boal, 2008: 

134).  

Rituals and Masks were created by Augusto Boal as one of the approaches of showcasing and 

exploring oppression in the Forum Theatre model, in an effort to disrupt the one-sidedness of an 

oppressive monologue to disrupt the monologue through creating an exploratory dialogue between 

the oppressed and the oppressor (Boal, 2002). It is a tool that scrutinizes everyday mundane masks 

put on by people as an adherence to the prescriptions of their social status or occupation, stating 

that, “whether trader, labourer, student, actor or whatever, all specialists end up assuming the mask 

of their specialty” (Boal, 2002: 201). Boal (1979: 133) states that “this particular technique of a 

people’s theatre (‘Rituals and Masks’) consists precisely in revealing the superstructures, the 

rituals which reify all human relationships, and the masks of behaviour that those rituals impose 

on each person according to the role he plays in society and the rituals he must perform”.  

To further the understanding of how practitioners can employ this tool, Boal (1979: 134) gives an 

example of the same scene staged by two actors four times: 

 First scene: the priest and the parishioner are landlords; 

Second scene: the priest is a landlord and the parishioner is a peasant; 

Third scene: the priest is a peasant and the parishioner is a landlord; 

Fourth scene: the priest and the parishioner are peasants.  

The actors play out the same ritual in each instance. However, the social masks worn by the actors 

will cause each scene to differ. This tool can be adapted into multiple variants where people 

perform “the same ritual changing masks; the same ritual performed by people of one social class, 

and later by people of another class; exchange of masks within the same ritual; etc.” (Boal, 1979: 

134). 



31 
 

Contemporary scholars have criticized Boal’s tools and their effectiveness in today’s political 

climate because “Boal developed his seminal theories in the context of an oppressive military 

regime in which distinctions between oppressor and oppressed were, as he [Boal] puts it, ‘concrete 

and visible’” (Snyder-Young, 2011: 31). Contrary to Boalian times, South Africa’s current 

political systems are riddled with ambiguous oppressors and oppression is more slippery. Snyder-

Young (2011), expands on the challenging nature of identifying the oppressed and oppressor in 

the Northern American, Western European contexts and other late capitalistic democratic contexts 

such as South Africa, arguing that,  

It can be challenging for participants and jokers alike to fix stable lines between oppressor 

and oppressed as all are intertwined in capitalism’s complex web and united by the 

consumption of mass media. As Bruce McConachie puts it, ‘politicians and pundits 

encourage middle class Americans to see themselves frequently as victims and to 

misperceive the genuine oppression of others (McConachie, 2002: 254 in Snyder-Young, 

2011: 32). The same is true in reverse, as myths of meritocracy and hard work leading to 

individual upward mobility blame the oppressed for not working hard enough to overcome 

oppression, making structural inequalities appear invisible. Within this complex landscape, 

who decides how the lines between oppressor and oppressed are drawn? What happens 

when one community of spect-actors define their own ‘liberation’ in ways or pressing 

another? (2011: 32).  

The questions posed by Snyder-Young (2011) were essential in the way this inquiry highlighted 

the dyadic dynamic of the GBV victim-survivor, the perceived oppressed and simultaneous enabler 

of the oppression. This inquiry, therefore, drew from Snyder-Young’s (2011) provocation of 

scrutinizing the duality of the role of the victim-perpetuator that enabled GBV in her intimate 

partner relationship.   

The ritual in Rituals and Masks, in this inquiry, refers to a frequent action or occurrence that is 

normalised, therefore becoming a ritual – as defined by the Merriam-Webster dictionary as “an act 

or series of acts regularly repeated in a set precise manner” (Merriam-Webster 2022, ritual entry). 

This definition supplements Boal’s (2002) perspective of the rituals being repeated occurrences 

that are causes and perpetuators of oppression. This perspective of rituals intersects with the rituals 

that create battered women because, as outlined above in the description of BWS, the victim 



32 
 

becomes exposed to a cycle of abuse that eventually batters her (Walker, 1981).  Another 

intersectionality of this viewpoint on ritual is emphasised in Butler’s (1994) description of the 

performance of gender, asserting that gender is a process, “…a set of repeated acts within a highly 

rigid regulatory frame” (Salih, 2007: 56). This is supported by Clissold’s (2020) claim of women 

being “…both passive victims and resourceful, dynamic actors in the face of acute and gradual 

disasters” (Clissold, et al, 2020: 101).   

 

All these actions, these rituals that occur frequently, determine their mask (Boal, 2002) because 

people performing prescribed actions upkeep rituals wearing the specific masks required by the 

ritual they perform. An understanding of the intersectionalities between these concepts influenced 

how I prepared the ritual installations.  

 

Extensive literature has been written about mask work from multiple perspectives and contexts. 

“One unifying theme within this literature is that the mask comes from a ritualistic heritage, 

impacting on the way it is used in its various contexts” (Hockey, 2008: 5). Shepherd (1990) reports 

the lack of a universal agreement amongst theorists about when and where masks were first used, 

though mask work dates back approximately nine thousand years in Mexican, Balinese, Japanese, 

Egyptian, African, and various indigenous cultures. Apart from indigenous and cultural use, masks 

were a dominant feature of theatre in Ancient Greece to enhance actors’ features to accommodate 

audiences housed at the back of a huge Greek amphitheatre auditorium (Shepherd, 1990).  

Contrary to the notion of the theatrical use of masks for enhancing actors’ features on stage, Boal 

(2008) asserts that masks are beyond a visual artifact that actors wear, rather they influence the 

ecosystem with structural factors within which people live. “The relations of production 

(infrastructure) determine the culture of a society (superstructure). Sometimes the infrastructure 

changes but the superstructure for a while remains the same” (Boal, 2008: 133). To expand on this 

assertion, Boal (2008) gives an example of how peasants in Brazil were prohibited from making 

eye contact when interacting with their landlords. They would murmur, “yes, sir; yes, sir” while 

staring at the ground. This behaviour remained the same even after the government decreed an 

agrarian reform before 1964 declaring that peasants could become landowners. The peasants stared 

the ground and murmured, “yes, friend; yes, friend” (Boal, 2008). 



33 
 

Boal’s (2008) example of how the operation of Brazil’s political and economic systems created 

masks of docility for the peasants, so much that they could not alter their behavioural masks even 

after being legally declared equals to their former masters is instructive. This is synonymous with 

how South African economic, traditional, and cultural structures operated in ways that positioned 

me to become an unintentional victim-enabler of GBV in an intimate partner relationship. This 

was a result of the economic, cultural, and social masks of submission I was socialised into 

adopting as a part of my identity and a black, Xhosa, South African woman. The specific exercise 

used to explore the phenomenon found in Augusto Boal’s Games for Actors and non-actors is 

called Making the mask all-encompassing (Boal, 2002: 155).  In this exercise Boal (2002) 

emphasises that,  

The mask superimposes itself on the human being, but under the mask life goes on. This 

exercise consists of making the mask invade the whole of the human being, to the point of 

eliminating all other signs of life. The ‘human component of the worker is not adequate for 

the mechanical work he has to achieve; thus, the less human the worker, the more efficient 

he is and the more he turns into an automation. The actor makes his body do movements 

which the worker normally does, the mask gradually gains the upper hand, till the worker 

‘dies’ (2002: 155).  

Suffice to note that Boal’s application of Rituals and Masks is usually conducted in a group 

context. I have adapted the technique to be a self-reflexive process. Below I explain how I set up 

the rituals to explore how I perpetuated GBV unknowingly. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



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The process 

Preparing the self  

In order to use Rituals and Masks as a method, I needed to set up certain personal rituals. Before I 

was able to set up the rituals, I needed to write the background to my story as part of my 

autoethnographic process. This was an important step because it helped through bridging me into 

the physically explorative mode of the phenomenon, something I could not do because I 

experienced resistance due to a fear of unpleasant triggers that were likely to result from the 

exploration of Rituals and Masks. This is an abstract of my reflective journal as part of preparing 

the self.  

 

Background to how I enabled GBV in the intimate partner relationship 

I had just turned 19 and decided to leave the apartment I shared with two friends to go take a walk 

along the beach at SunCoast Casino in Durban, South Africa. It was around 7pm and I decided to 

go back to the apartment. On my way to the exit to catch a taxi back home, I was stopped by this 

good-looking and fresh-scented young man. He politely asked for my contact details, promising 

to celebrate my birthday with me the following day. I had spent the day alone at the apartment. I 

wanted to do something for myself but all I had was R50.00 to transport myself to and from campus 

for the remainder of the week. I agreed to meet the following day and we celebrated my birthday, 

as he had promised. He was kind and accommodating throughout the time we spent together. He 

was eager to hear more of my stories and to find out about my love. There was a comforting quality 

in the way he spoke to me – it made me feel important and heard. A few weeks later I could not 

make rent and was facing possible eviction because it had not been the first or second time, I was 

late with my rental payment. I could not contact my father because he was unemployed and barely 

keeping financially afloat at the time. I could not ask my mother either. Asking her for anything 

felt draining for me at the time because I was aware of the numerous financial responsibilities she 

had to fulfil on her own, including my university fees, my younger sister’s school fees, and her 

and my grandmother’s needs. It had been a few years after my parents divorced for reasons they 

never wanted to explain to me because they thought I was too young to understand. Ironically, my 

parents expected me to facilitate their communication of my financial needs to my unemployed 



35 
 

father because I was assigned his financial responsibility during the legal settlement of their 

divorce.  

So, I was almost homeless in a city extremely far away from home. My relationship with the man 

had progressed by then and he politely offered that I move in with him to reduce the financial 

strain I was experiencing. I moved in with him because I had no long-term place to stay and was 

tired of alternating between friends' places who offered me shelter for a night or two. The 

relationship progressed even further after I moved in with the man. I realized that he treated and 

appreciated me in a way that I wanted my father to love, acknowledge and treat me, yet he was not 

playing the role of a father figure in my life. He was addressing a childhood insecurity I grew up 

with and because of that, I allowed my dependency on him to grow beyond being a temporary fix 

to my accommodation issues.  

He took on the characteristics of the man I wanted, some form of a father figure that validated my 

yearn for fatherly love. He kept making remarks about how good I was to him and that stroked my 

ego because I knew I was good at modelling what is traditionally perceived as a good woman 

because I was socialized into becoming the good woman majority of my life. After a while, his 

behaviour started changing. He started giving mean and uninterested responses and his interest 

and attentiveness to my needs faded slowly. When I expressed this observation to him, he 

smothered me with all the attention I could ask for and I believed that things were back to normal. 

How amazing it felt to be the centre of his world again because I had performed my womanhood 

right and it won him over. This cycle of coldness and excessive warmth repeated and with each 

coldness came a harsher word, a firmer fist, and a harder shove onto the ground. I pushed my 

friends away each time this cycle happened because I was engulfed by the fear of admitting that I 

felt like I had failed and was being punished for my inability to be a sufficient woman that can 

make him happy. I was trying to figure myself out and I let the exploration of the woman I was 

becoming revolve around a man who made me feel good about everything once upon a time. I got 

tired of making up lies that I needed to remember the next time a different friend asks about what 

happened and so I pushed them even further away. It was the abusive, irregular man and me against 

the world.  

I remember the first time he beat me to a pulp. My reaction to this incident reiterates Walker’s 

(1981) assertion of stage 1 of a battering relation, stating that a woman “…tends to minimise the 



36 
 

significance of the events and [mollifying] her attacker” (Walker 1981 in Savage, 2006: 762). 

Instead of worrying about my wellbeing and trying to heal from the abuse at the time, I was 

concerned about his mental wellbeing, convincing myself that his childhood trauma was informing 

his behaviour. He had told me at the beginning of our relationship that he was orphaned at a young 

age. He grew up feeling ostracized by his family members and their children and so he had to learn 

to fend for himself from quite a young age. He had managed to put himself through half of his 

primary schooling, high school, and tertiary. I managed to talk him into taking the offer of free 

therapy sessions that were paid for by the company he worked for at the time. The smothering 

began again, and he had started seeing a professional to help him process the traumas I believed 

were haunting him. He apologised and promised to change and never hurt me again. I was happy 

again. I convinced myself that I had not failed the man. All he needed was a few therapy sessions 

to help him realise that he acted out of character, help him process his feelings and things would 

be back to normal. Again, this sudden change was a textbook definition of a batterer, verifying 

Walker’s (1981) notion of the batterer taking action to show that he will change as he convinces 

the woman that he will never hurt her again. In hindsight, I realised that I was trauma bonded to 

the man at this point in the relationship.  

As the relationship progressed, I lost more of my friends and gradually started interacting with a 

small portion of his friendship circle. He and his friends would recount their experiences of stories 

that demonstrated their comfortability of violating women’s autonomy. One of the stories shared 

was that of a woman who visited one of his friends. When the woman refused to engage in sexual 

intercourse with the friend, the friend got angry, told her he was doing her a favour by wanting to 

be with him, and kicked her out in the middle of the night. He didn’t care about her safety and how 

she would travel back home, although he had promised to drive her home the following day. He 

continued to say how he had enough money to lure any girl he wants and how stupid that woman 

had been for not seizing the opportunity. I laughed at the story because I knew how good it felt to 

have my financial needs catered for by a man who only expects you to be a good woman. His 

actions were partly justified in my eyes, he performed his prescribed male role, and she was not a 

good woman to him. My comprehension of autonomy and consent were blurred by the yearning 

of wanting to be a good enough woman. If that meant violating my autonomy, so be it. I 

demonstrated to the man I was with that night that I was willing to allow my boundaries of 

autonomy and consent for being a good woman; I was unintentionally willing to enable abusive 



37 
 

behaviour towards myself and other women because I thought it justified and he took advantage 

of that revelation. I was not aware at the time that my behaviour was enabling GBV. 

I remember a time when I came back from a long, sunny, and tiring day around 22:00. I had lectures 

from 08:00 till 14:00 and various drama productions rehearsals from 14:00 to 21:30. I felt sticky 

from sweat and all I wanted to do was to take a shower and sleep when I got home. But I did not. 

I could not take a shower because I knew that when he came back, he would open my legs whether 

I had cleaned myself up after I got home. I could not shower because he had somehow made me 

believe it was my fault that he was insecure and possessive of me and that the only way for him to 

know that I had not had sexual engagements when I was not at the apartment was for him to inspect 

my crotch when I came back. His behaviour had developed into the degradation stage of the rape 

culture pyramid (11th Principle: Consent!, 2015). He coerced, manipulated, blamed, and shamed 

me for cleaning myself up in his absence because me cleaning myself up was not reassuring for 

his insecurities. There would be occasional threats of kicking me out if I dared to question his 

behaviour. He would gloat about my no longer having friends to go to – because I had pushed 

everyone away to make him comfortable. It was at this point that I started experiencing learned 

helplessness because I believed I lost all control over how the relationship turned out. It felt 

impossible to escape the situation because I had alienated the people who were in my life. This 

was yet again, a textbook explanation of the concept of learned helplessness (Walker, 1981) that 

is described in the battered woman section above. 

All these encounters were cyclical. The financial dependency on an abusive man, the traditional 

indoctrinations of what it meant to be a good Xhosa woman who can keep a man, and the 

normalised rape culture enabling behaviour that occurred around me, all operated in ways that 

socialised me into feeling and acting like a battered woman, adopting a mask that made me 

perpetuate and enable GBV in an intimate partner relationship unintentionally.    

 

Preparing the mind, body, and space 

Preparing myself for experimenting in the rituals began in October 2021 when I was nearing the 

proposal submission of this inquiry. I started attending drama therapy sessions because I 

anticipated an emotional and psychological unease, especially because my research prompted me 

to revisit past battering experiences. I was both nervous and excited about this journey – excited 



38 
 

because this inquiry is me holding myself accountable publicly, in hopes that another woman going 

through a similar experience could have the courage to hold themselves accountable for a part they 

may be playing knowingly or unknowingly in perpetuating GBV in their intimate partner 

relationships. I was nervous because I soon realised that I started to remember some battering 

experiences I had suppressed through compartmentalising what I could and could not deal with 

and process alone back when the battering occurred. I continued with the therapy session because 

I needed grounding and support to unpack these memories that I suddenly remembered. The 

therapeutic relationship is currently ongoing and will continue until I complete this report.  

 

Fast forward to preparation for experimenting within the ritual. I intuitively developed a pre-ritual, 

where I changed into black comfortable clothes in silence. The initial impulse behind this was 

informed by wanting to get out of my usual routine, to bridge myself into the world of performing 

the ritual where the experiment is meant to take place. I soon realised that changing into black 

allowed me to mourn the battered woman because I never got to mourn her properly. Revisiting 

who she used to be, a woman who operated in a battered sphere made me realise that she conquered 

that part of her life, and it was never mourned. And so, mourning her is paying homage to her 

through referencing the Xhosa traditional ritual of mourning loved ones wearing black. The 

practice of mourning while wearing black is a common practice among Xhosa people, as cited by 

Potelwa (2016) in a study about Xhosa burials.  The black becomes a state of mourning, not for a 

departed formally battered woman, but for a survivor who learned from the battering experiences.  

 

After preparing myself, I then had to prepare the space where the ritual took place. I used white 

sheets to create a circle on the floor. The ritual took place inside the demarcated space – the circle. 

Because preparing the self became a state of mourning, laying the white sheets out ritualistically 

and visually presented itself synonymously to a ritual performed during umbuyiso8. The purpose 

of the ceremony of ukubuyisa9 normally performed a year or two after the deceased’s passing is 

“… to call and welcome the deceased back into the family in order that he can be able to take care 

of the family” (Yawa, 2010: 91) and to celebrate the life they lived. The pre-ritual ritual of laying 

white sheets onto the ground to demarcate the performance space symbolically became a 

 
8  Umbuyiso – an unveiling ceremony performed in the Xhosa culture. 
9 Ukubuyisa – the verb of the noun umbuyiso, translated to “to bring back home” 



39 
 

welcoming back of myself to take care of me during the performance of the ritual. The laying of 

the white sheets also became a celebration of a woman who, once upon a time, felt stifled and 

incapacitated by the battering experience, who is currently opening parts of her vulnerability up 

for academic and public scrutiny as she continues her healing journey. This also became a 

celebration of the battered woman and the lessons she took from the battering experience that 

inform who she has become – to a certain degree.  

 

After demarcating the space, I placed a blue character mask that covers only the eye area on the 

right, and a pink eye-character mask on the left with a black doek. I wore the blue masks when 

playing the oppressor (the batterer); the pink mask and headscarf to play the oppressed (the 

battered) protagonist; and I had no mask to wear when playing the joker. The antagonist, the 

oppressor and the oppressed had an encounter within the demarcated space while the joker 

operated from outside the demarcated space because the joker assumed a neutral role of facilitating 

the interaction between the antagonist and the protagonist.  

The disruption of the ritual that enables and perpetuates GBV in an intimate partner relationship 

was explored under three themes: the traditional, economic, and cultural influences that informed 

my perpetuating and enabling of GBV in a former intimate partner relationship: 

 

Ritual 1: Traditional influences  

I grew up in Qumbu, a small town in the Eastern Cape under the patriarchal upbringing of Xhosa 

men and women. My upbringing was riddled with my girl cousins, and I, being taught to fulfil all 

domestic duties in the homestead, to become good wives that will be worth many cows when 

receiving dowry. We were taught to sit with closed legs, to look down when being addressed by 

elders, male elders in particular, and to know that our place is in the kitchen. We were taught to 

never question or contest decisions that were made by elders or my boy cousins that I grew up 

with. I witnessed marriages where men dictated, and women submitted. These actions were also 

present in brother-sister relationships, where the brother’s opinion weighed more than the sister’s 

opinion regardless of the sister’s opinion being more logical and practical. As a child, I absorbed 

these behavioural patterns, thinking that is how adulthood is, without realising that all my family 

and community members were adhering to prescribed and stereotypical gendered behaviour, as 

outlined by Butler’s (1994) theory of gender performance. I was not aware that the rituals of 



40 
 

socialisation I was exposed to over time created an identification mask of a woman who performed 

her gender the only way I knew. 

 

Ritual 2: Economic influences  

Ubuhle bendoda zinkomo zayo. This is a common saying among Nguni tribes (Matyila, 2015) that 

is directly translated into the beauty of a man lies in the number of his cows. I grew up being taught 

that cows are a man’s currency to prove his wealth, with teachings of aspiring to become the best 

in performing domestic duties and becoming a well-behaved girl to attract a wealthy man to take 

care of me and the home I was supposed to build. There were no conversations about the income 

generated by women because it is believed to be a man’s responsibility to cater to all household 

financial responsibilities while the woman tends to the babies and other domestic duties that need 

completion. I witnessed female relatives and neighbours who stayed in unhappy and abusive 

marriages because they had no financial resources to support themselves and their children. They 

too were performers of prescribed gendered expectations who wore the socialised masks that made 

them submissive while men performed the prescribed macho figures who governed subservient 

women and poor men who did not own livestock.  



41 
 

Ritual 3: Cultural influence 

 

Figure 1 Rape Culture Pyramid (11th Principle: Consent!, 2015). 

This rape culture pyramid was created by an organisation named 11th Principle: Consent! aimed at 

promoting conversations on various social media platforms about normalised cyclic behaviour that 

leads to the normalisation of rape culture (11th Principle: Consent!, 2015). I have witnessed and 

have been a recipient of the behaviours outlined in the normalisation phase of the pyramid. 

Catcalling, rape jokes, unwanted non-sexual touch, sexist attitudes, and locker room banter were 

all – and still are – a part of normal everyday life in the various communities I have been a part of 

since childhood.  

 

During my tweenage (between younger and teenage) years, there were local boys who hung out in 

corners, waiting to ukushela10 igqiyazana11. When a girl showed the slightest disinterest at their 

catcalling, the young would throw demeaning remarks and rape jokes at us. I remember a particular 

 
10 Ukushela – to mack on, to hit on, flirt with or seduce a female using verbal and physical means of persuasion. 
11  Igqiyazana – a young girl. 



42 
 

incident that happened when I was 12 years old. My body started developing into a woman earlier 

than my peers, and so I had small pointy breasts sprouting from my chest. This one boy attempted 

macking on me, and upon my refusal, he said he would not fuck me and pointy breasts anyway 

because they’d poke him, while attempting to touch my body without my consent. I remember 

another incident where there was a nice young boy I really liked from around my neighbourhood. 

My boy cousins forbade me from seeing him because, “he is dirty,” they said. I did not understand 

what they meant by that and upon many of my failed attempts to let me see him, they told me that 

he liked saying dirty things about girls, saying it was okay and funny that he was doing such, but 

they would not allow someone to act in the same manner towards their sister. My boy cousins 

partook in locker room banter, and they knew it was immoral, which is why they did not want their 

friends to do what they all did to me and my girl cousins.  

 

Access to technology and the development of its messaging systems has made it easier to carry 

out violating acts of sending revenge porn and non-consensual photos and videos, as reported by 

Mbude (2020) on the illegalisation of revenge porn in South Africa.  

Growing up seeing how youngsters adopted behaviours performed by black, Xhosa elderly men 

and women made me believe that was the right and the only way of treating people, although it 

led to me partaking in acts that escalated the abuse I was experiencing. And so, when I got into an 

abusive relationship where the actions I was socialised into accepting as normal growing up 

happened. Although I knew I did not like and enjoy what I was experiencing, I still thought it was 

normal. I even made excuses for the abuser when my friends would ask about the bruises on my 

body. I was socialised into a mask of docility that did not make me question why I did not stand 

up for myself and take the help I was offered by my friends.  

 

The ritual performance  

I will note three scenarios that display how I enabled and perpetuated GBV in the intimate partner 

relationship from the traditional, cultural, and economic perspectives. The scenarios are based on 

the experiences I went through during the battering relationship and have been adapted from the 

original Nguni language that was spoken to the past, and to the present tense to allow for 

exploration using Rituals and Masks.  

 



43 
 

Ritual 1 performance abstract: Cultural influence 

It is late at night. I just came from performing in a theatre production. I am tired and getting ready 

for bed.  

He:  Come here.  

Her:  Not tonight, I’m tired.  

He:  That’s strange because you just allowed that boy from the play to be intimate with you in 

front of other people, in front of strangers.   

Her:  You know that’s not how it was. That was a rehearsed production and there were no 

feelings involved.  

He:  So, you can be a slut for him, not me?  

Her:  That’s not how it is.  

He touches Her sensually. Her moves away from the touch.  

He:  (impatient) You’re denying me access, yet you allowed another boy to touch you?  

Her:  Listen, I’m tired and I want to sleep. Can we do this another time?  

He: So, you enjoyed it when he (other boy) touched you. You were having fun, giggling at him 

while strangers watched you. If you love me… if you don’t want me to leave you and kick 

you out, you will show me that you want to make us work. You will do this for me, for us.  

Her does not want to do this but leans in to kiss He. End scene.  

 

Ritual 2 performance abstract: Economic influence  

It is a cold winter evening. Her sits in the department’s scriptwriting lecture room with Her male 

classmate. They’re both working on their scripts to be examined the following day. He arrives to 

pick Her up to go home.  

He:  Who is he (classmate)? Why’re you alone with him in this room?  

Her:  he is my classmate. Everyone left not so long ago because they finished working on their 

scripts. 

Silence.  

Her:  Give me a moment to finish this dialogue, then I’ll pack my things and we’ll go.  

Silence. 

He:  You’re lying to me. You planned to spend time with him alone. 



44 
 

He approaches classmate angrily, attempting to start a fight. Classmate defends himself while Her 

tries to stop the fight that is about to ensue.   

Her:  Okay, then. Beat me. Beat me up. I set this up.  

He:  I know you did. We’ll sort this out at home.  

He and Her leave. End scene. 

 

Ritual 3 performance abstract: Traditional influence  

It is a hot, humid summer afternoon. Her is watching TV from bed. He just came back from work.  

He:  You’re back early today.  

Her:  Rehearsals got cancelled.  

He: You showered?  

Her:  Yes, I was hot and sticky.  

He: Or you were hiding something.  

Her: What would I possibly hide by taking a shower?  

He:  Another man’s scent and semen.  

Her:  You’re impossible! 

He: How am I supposed to know that you didn’t do anything? What if you lied about rehearsals 

the other days to go get fucked? I wouldn’t know because you washed him off.  

Her:  What do you want?  

He:  I want you to prove that you didn’t fuck then wash someone off you while I was at work.  

Her:  And how would I do that?  

He: You must show me. 

Her:  How? 

He:  You know how.  

Her:  Do I really have to do that, though?  

He:  Are YOU questioning me?  

Her lies on er back, opens her legs and exposes her crotch for He to inspect. End scene.  

  

The selection of these specific scenarios to explore was informed by Boal’s (2002) suggestion of 

disrupting the ritual that oppresses the oppressed. It made sense for the ritual, the enabling cycle 

to be disrupted, not the mask; disrupting my masks would imply that I would have had to change 



45 
 

myself abruptly without interrogating the action that made me like that because “the habit makes 

the monk!” (Boal, 2002: 201). Disrupting the ritual that performs and reveals the oppressions 

became a rehearsal toward the revolution of the ability to identify the specific moments of the 

enabling and how to address those moments to limit the enabling of gender-based violence in the 

intimate partner relationship. Boal (2002) does caution, after all, that, “very often the ritual 

contains elements which are actual causes of the oppression being treated, and frequently, 

liberation from the oppression of necessity involves the rupture of its rituals” (2002: 200).  

 

Disrupting the ritual  

As stated above under the description of the method section, the specific exercise I used to explore 

and disrupt the ritual is Making the mask all-encompassing.  

 

I explored each of the three rituals scripted above separately. I read each ritual out loud at least 

five times. I then walked within the perimeters of the demarcated spaces to physicalise first the 

role of the oppressor, exploring the oppressor’s mask and finding and embodying suitable 

mannerisms displaying a like for exercising power unnecessarily for the oppressor. I went on to 

mutter, the articulate ideal sound